Here is the American history of the mullet, in less than 150 words:
1845: James K. Polk is sworn in as the 11th president of the United States, and the first public figure in the nation's history to sport a mullet.
1954: Michael Bolton is born.
1972: David Bowie adopts his mulleted Ziggy Stardust persona, launching the haircut into popular culture.
1991: The mullet hits its cultural peak, with the biggest movie star (Mel Gibson), biggest television star (Jerry Seinfeld) and most popular singer (Bolton) all wearing the haircut.
1995: The Beastie Boys go on an anti-mullet campaign, making fun of the haircut in interviews and with the song "Mullet Head."
1996: Metallica releases "Load," revealing new short haircuts. Chaos in the mullet community ensues.
2005: Lanky fastballer and mullet holdout Randy Johnson joins the New York Yankees, and cuts his hair. This leaves former Journey front man Steve Perry as the last celebrity in the world with a mullet.